Maybe life isn’t for me
"I live on what makes other people die" (Michelan gelo). There is no better definition of loneliness.
The tyranny of happiness. This idea that it’s something that we should have. None of us really know what it is, but we’re told that we should have it, that it’s promised to us as a birthright. And this sort of obsession with something so vaporous, it’s like being obsessed with a cloud. But it does ruin people in a way. This feeling that if you haven’t gotten it, if you’re not happy, there’s something you’re doing wrong. And if you don’t want it necessarily there’s something else you’re doing wrong.
the sheer level of galaxy brain jane austen was on when she wrote,
“if i loved you less i might be able to talk about it more”.
The love you feel for one person will never feel the same as love for another. There's great melancholy in heartbreak for that reason, but more love will come, and it will be new and wondrous, but never the same.
"Never the SAME" 🖤
i only care about people with no friends who go on long walks to nowhere alone
everynight feels exactly the same. But why?
And I scream: I feel, I suffer, I am happy, I am moved. Only my enigma interests me. More than anything, I search for myself in my great void.
Clarice Lispector, tr. by Johnny Lorenz, Um Sopro de Vida
I am not the whiskey you want, I am the water you need.
“I don’t care, I love you anyhow. It is too late to turn you out of my heart. Part of you lives here.”— Anne Sexton
But the thing I will never admit to anyone who's met me is how desperately I want to be loved, I don't think I could say it. How I want someone to hold my wrists and kiss my palms and smile at me, and want me, I want to be wanted and I don't know how long poetry or songs will substitute for being wanted.
Perhaps I am chosen to teach you something much more wonderful - the meaning of sorrow and its beauty.
— Oscar Wilde, from De Profundis, ca. 1905
the next time i’m opening up is during my autopsy heh
i will not accept a hint, i will act dumb until you say it clearly to me
In case you ever foolishly forget; I am never not thinking of you.
آنسو نکل آئیں تو خود پونچھنا۔۔
لوگ پونچھنے آئیں گے تو سودا کریں گے
Prove to yourself by improving yourself
when you know you are becoming a better person, you don't have to prove it to anyone
there is freedom in the realization you may never understand why people do things, and that you don't need an explanation to move on.
not able to untie the chains and change my course.
False pride rules supreme,
always there to whisper in my ear.
Time, wasted and badly spent,
lots of hurt, lots to repent.
Solace, please come and calm my soul,
for this is what I need to make me whole.
Empathy, what I need is for someone to see,
someone to see the real me.
Love with no strings,
just giving generously amongst other things.
Words, when used as a weapon can cut like a knife,
capable of doing so much damage and take the joy out of life,
but softly spoken and softly expressed
can bring so much happiness.
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